beachepisode | [ week one: overflow ]

MINGLE LOG

The way you arrive might vary from person to person. Perhaps, you wake up on the beach, with your pet cat licking your face. Or you wake up tucked away in your bed, an item of yours nearby and a card on the bedside table reading your name and Welcome to the manor!

Either way, you end up in a modern mansion on a empty, lonely beach, with no explanation of why you're there or what's going on. In the driveway, there is a car with keys in the ignition but, unfortunately, no gas in the tank. In the living room, there is a touch screen television featuring a variety of profiles featuring you and the many other lost souls trapped in this mansion alongside with you.

There is also a camera crew. A camera crew? Really? But following the characters along are blank faced mannequins in a variety of colors, dressed in all black, operating cameras to film them. If you try and talk to the crew, they say nothing (as they have no mouth or eyes or... anything) and just continue to film them. Trying to touch them results in the mannequin falling over and going immobile, only to be replaced by a new one that appears from... somewhere? Weird.

The kitchen is fully stocked. There are spare clothes in the closets. There's even a few video game systems with games in the living room as well. There are books to read in the library. There's writing and drawing materials in the office. There's things to do. Just... why? To what end? What's going on here?

For those intrepid folks who decide to walk as far as they can away from the manor and the beach will find themselves blinking at one point and suddenly being back in the front yard of the manor. Huh. Strange.

Answers don't seem to be coming anytime soon. You might as well just... settle in?

—

PROPERTY DAMAGE | PRIVATE CONVERSATIONS

♥

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

How is that enrichment!

Because... friends?

[ 👉👈 ]

Friends don’t let friends end up on murder television!

[jesus christ]

Well, then maybe you shouldn't have come on the show, then we wouldn't have to have brought your friend along. So really, the onus is on you.

You can take your blame and shove it straight up your onus. I don’t want anything to do with this — but if I don’t have a choice, at least send her back.

[ God, really set that one up entirely. Amazing. PB is stunned by the wordplay. ]

Wow, you're good.

[ Anyway! ]

Anyway, no.

[😔

Ugh. Great. Now he gets to feel guilty about Grace being here!!!]

…Then what are the win conditions? How long will this “game” last?

Six weeks, maybe less. Win conditions are get good ratings.

Really? No “find all the culprits and the game ends” ruling?

Well, yeah, if you do that then the ratings will be good and we'll have to end the show. But you have to do something with the mafia if you find them all, you know? For the ratings.

[uh]

Do something with them?

Yeah, like. Punish them. Kill them. Have an orgy. [ ⁉️ ] Something.

I’m ignoring that last part.

[I’M NOT HERE FOR ORGIES]

So we’d actually get to decide?

[ love island dreams... dashed... ]

Yeah, as long as it's entertaining!

[what you're telling me here is that they could have one giant orgy and maybe the game would be over-]

What if we throw one big kumbaya session? Love and peace doesn't get high enough ratings for you sick bastards?

[ Look, that would be novel enough to get the ratings, for sure. ]

Whooooo cares about love and peace? Come on, reality TV functions on ✨drama✨! No one wants to see people hold hands. Unless it's two people holding hands with people who aren't their lovers. Oooh, spicy!

[Milly cares about love and peace.........................]

[This is quickly becoming a pointless and tiring conversation for Leon, who is starting to think he won't get anything actually useful from this guy.]

Spoken like a true reality TV host. You got a boss lurking around here somewhere, too?

Yay!

[ That's a compliment if he's ever heard one. ]

The producers! They made me and I have never met them.

Do we get to eventually say hello?

[intensely say hello]

[ . . . ]

Probably not!

[Of course not.]

This is bullshit, you know that?

[WHATEVER MAN]

Haha, yeah.

[ Sorry, old man. ]

Any other questions? I really will answer whatever you ask!

That's not true. You've already proven otherwise. [downthread with Milly! if we hammer the same problem hard enough maybe an answer will spill out, right,] But let's test it: how are we going to be able to view our contracts after we die?

Okay, true.

[ You people keep catching him in his hypocrisy... terrible.

But for now he tilts his head to one side, then the other. Hm. Okay, maybe he can give... some sort of answer here. ]

You can view them in purgatory.

(no subject)

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